Have you ever found yourself wanting to do something outside of your comfort zone, then quickly talk yourself out of it? Whether that be to start your dream business, make a career move, or ask that person on a date. Self-doubt gets in the way and we can freeze. Our inner critic can tell us that we are not good enough. When bombarded by elements that can lower our self-belief, we can take charge of building up our confidence and resiliency muscles… to live the life you want and be the awesome person you are.
This topic comes up quite frequently with my clients, and I have had my share of my inner critic speaking up when going out of comfort zone. Below I will share some tips to build your muscles in this area.
1. Feeling the range of emotions you have without judgement. The pleasant and not so pleasant. You are a human and have a full range of emotions and feelings. Sometimes it is uncomfortable! We can feel a full range from anger, frustration to joy and love. Allow your self to feel them, but they don’t have to derail you from the things you want to do. By allowing yourself to be with and still take steps forward, it builds resiliency, emotional strength and confidence in yourself to manage challenging emotions.
2. Speaking up and being heard. This may be sharing your thoughts, asking for what you need or want and self-expression. While we can be mindful and intentional in our speaking, it’s allowing yourself to speak up and be heard versus hiding and playing small because you are fearful of using your voice.
3. Taking Action. Take small steps forward towards your vision and goals in your life, even when you feel scared. Each step you can take can build confidence in yourself. Celebrate the steps you are taking to go forward!
4. Ending Self criticism and beat-up. This is one is so important! We can be our worst critic and be so critical about ourself in our minds. It can be an endless cycle that can be stopped. When we are in the self beat up cycle, it can be a hindrance to our self-confidence. Notice when you are in the self critical loop, acknowledge it, have compassion for yourself and practicing letting it go and choosing thoughts that would better serve you.
5. Accept Compliments. As anyone ever gave you a compliment, and you found yourself not being able to take it in and hear it? Compliments are a mirror of who you are and the great qualities people see in you. Practicing receiving and allowing compliments, they are a reflection of you are!
6. Allow yourself see your positive qualities and achievements: Maybe that’s reminding yourself of accomplishments you have already had and the things you are good at. Maybe you have a great smile, or you nailed that work project. Allow yourself to acknowledge your positive qualities and achievements, no matter how large or small. Do this often!
7. Spending time outdoors. Spending time outdoors in nature can a be a big confidence and resilience booster. For one, it allows you to connect with yourself. When you are on a trek, long walk, or climbing a mountain(big or small), when you get to the top, it can be an amazing feeling and the knowledge you can do it.
Life and Leadership Coach, Licensed Counselor, outdoor enthusiast, yoga lover and passionate about wellness.